Earthquake-Smerth-quake Says These Islanders

To all the Los Angeles pussies that are quaking in their Uggs over the next Dom DeLuise size tectonic plate shit-in-my-pants-shift, I enter into evidence the Pacific Island of Aogashima. This tiny bump of Earth is part of Japan that is located in the Philippine Sea but that’s neither here nor there. The loony lava lovers that live on this death furnace dig their home so much, they could give a crap that their dwellings are built upon an active volcano. The fire hole hasn’t shat out holy hell since 1780 but when it popped off, it killed half of the inhabitants. Starbucks won’t even open up a store here.

Read all about Aogashima in Amusing Planet.

And now, the Dom DeLuise rant from “The End”.