Now that Uncle Nipples (Vladimir Putin) is single again, I am sure he will be updating his eHarmony for Dictators and UKraineCupid accounts. Start signing up, ladies!
According to the Wall Street Journal, Uncle Nipples (as we call Putin on our daily liberal talk radio show, CrabNation) announced that he was splitting from longtime bride, Lyudmila Putina when they were being interviewed after an opera. The unhappy couple have two daughters, Maria and Yekaterina, who are in their twenties and stay out of the public eye.
Do you think Vlad will be hitting the gym for those moobs, and maybe getting another little nip and tuck on his face, before getting some new dating profile pics snapped?
Mrs. Ex-Putin has not been seen in public for a while. Hmmmm. And in true Russian fashion, Putin has had every reference to the ex-wife purged from his biography.
We are eagerly awaiting the Vladimir Putin version of The Bachelor. And don’t forget to use #UncleNipples on Twitter when talking to us about Vladimir Putin.