The Trump celebrity endorsements are in and it’s headlined by Scott Baio, a.k.a. Chachi. The Crabs offer a preview of an upcoming Democratic debate between Hillary and Bernie. A Bernie surrogate makes a dumbass comment. Duck Dick Willie Robertson has a podcast on Fox News that you will have to pay for! Bernie Sanders explains his oh so moderate religious beliefs. Affluenza boy Ethan Couch is technically now a man and gets transferred to adult jail. The horned-up Alabama Governor is in more hot water because he sent a helicopter to fetch his billfold. Beavers are making California really wet, hopefully. Ted Cruz is feeling fabulous after getting the endorsement of a bigoted, homophobic Colorado legislator. What’s up with all these stupid personhood bills getting shoved down our throats? Trump’s favorite Bible story is the one where a dude loses an eye after punching out the baby of a pregnant woman. Crooked televangelist Jim Bakker wants you to use his end-of-the-world food buckets for furniture. There was a terrifying cross burning in Iowa. Finally, the GOP gets a boner for possible fetal burial regulations.
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