CrabDiving – Thu 043015 – Texas To Defend Itself From The Imaginary, Budweiser Rapey, Dude Fists Bear

On this episode, the Crabs talk Bob Newhart conspiracy theories and learn about the secret to eternal youth. They also cover the following: old dude lets his fists do the talking much to the chagrin of a black bear. Glenn Beck giddy for persecution and punishment.  Gay marriage to doom us all according to a simpleton. Texas Governor buys into a bat-shit-crazy theory and vows to defend his stupid state.  El Paso ranks on a list of cities with the highest amounts of well-being, whatever that means.  Budweiser is now officially the preferred brew of rapists.  And lastly, a slew of RWNJs believe gay marriage is mos def the work of Satan, isn’t that special?

Greg Abbot tells Texas Guard to watch Obama troops

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