Cue-up the executive action outrage butt-hurt as the Crabs delve into RWNJ paranoia, ignorant GOP racism and extreme a-hole-ery on this National Bird Day edition of the Crabs. Faux news stupidly suggests Obama used an onion to produce the tears he shed on live television for the dead children at Sandy Hook. Mofos in the water are getting chomped to death by sharks in Australia. The Feds will eventually cut off the power and water to the simpleton, misguided militia morons occupying the bird sanctuary in Oregon. Fox News anchor person Megyn Kelly plays by her own rules, even when interviewing that idiot Ammon Bundy. A fire alarm goes off during charlatan and former real estate con-man Jim Bakker’s Jesus and soup infomercial and the former, scheming televangelist suggests it was set-off by Satan. Senator Ted Cruz and RWNJ christo-ninny James Dobson take turns sucking each other off, figuratively. The golden-voiced maniac Glenn Beck suggests Obama’s gun control measures will lead to back-alley suicides. A Colorado lawmaker, that moonlights as an internet radio personality, sort of called for the execution of a judge. Donald Trump pays for his first television campaign ad and it’s so Hitler. A creepy neo-nazi jerk-off suggests that Dylan Roof’s crimes were merely a hissy-fit compared to what’s to come. Happy 2016!
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