Trump is ranting to an empty White House that Biden lost the election. Shitler has struggled to mount a defense against impeachment. Infowars Czar Alex Jones is wanted by the FBI for questioning about his role in the riots in DC. The First Family has been packing up their crap and hopefully, the Trumps won’t steal White House treasures to flip on eBay. The Pentagon opted to not toss the fascist Rapist-In-Chief a farewell bash. The National Mall will be closed for Inauguration. The National Guard has been authorized to use lethal force to protect against insurrection. The FBI told police chiefs around the country to be on high alert for domestic terrorism. The Secret Service had to spend $3000 a month on a studio apartment next to Jarvanka’s six and a half bathroom spread because the First Daughter wouldn’t allow her security detail to use the bathroom at Jarvanka Manor. Trump’s infamous doc from the 2016 Presidential Campaign that said POTUS was in perfect health passed away. Delta won’t allow passengers flying to DC to check guns. Rogue squirrels have been attacking the good people of Queens in NYC. Lots of large Bitcoin payments have been made to far-right groups in the states as of late. One of the famed Tower of London ravens have gone missing and, sadly, the bird is presumed dead.
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