Roger Stone is a Dick Tracy character and welcome back, syphilis! The Florida GOP has been stricken with a scorching case of hypocrisy as they booted their party leader over a rape allegation but continue to support Trump, who is an alleged rapist. A witness said the face of the Republican Party, Shitler, had sex with many women at dead pedo Jeffrey Epstein’s New York spread. A Florida abortion rights measure had enough Hancock’s to get to the voters. United Airlines found loose bolts on door plugs on planes like the one whose freaking door blew off because apparently, no one at UA has a wrench! Governor Puddin’ Fingers blathered something moronic about gay people destroying the pristine institution of straight marriage. Diaper Don caterwauled he’d indict Biden if Clarence and the Supremes don’t grant him blanket immunity. The wee-fingered totalitarian neglected to sign a doc required by the state of Illinois to presidential hopefuls pledging to not advocate for the overthrow of the government. Turning Point USA, Charlie Kirk’s Nazi-club, fired a volunteer ambassador for posting antisemitic content on X. Turkey-bod tech bro Elon Musk admitted to having a drug problem, waaaaa.
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