Biden signed the COVID-19 relief bill as GOP clowns squeal about the deficit. Colorado announced they’re relaxing coronavirus restrictions at nursing homes. A nasty fecal bacteria has poisoned beaches in Northern Cali but the state government is keeping it on the DL. Representative Q-puke Marjorie Taylor Greene complained about getting justified shade over antivaxxer views. Horrific RWNJ podcaster Josh Bernstein declared that anyone forcing him to get a coronavirus vaccine will receive an injection of lead. The My Pillow traitor announced on Nazi Steve Bannon’s podcast he was launching a groundbreaking social media platform for MAGATS. Conservative states have drafted anti-equality laws attacking transgender athletes. Life in Missippi’s capital city continued despite the absence of safe drinking water. Florida is the most dangerous state in which to walk. The former creepy frontman of “Damn Yankees” and current NRA board member Ted Nugent muttered something insanely stupid about going to war if Biden tries to take his pea shooters. Alleged Lolita Express passenger and GOP talking head Geraldo Rivera said he wouldn’t run for an Ohio Senate seat. Actor Matthew McConaughey said he was blazing over whether to run for the Governorship of Texas. A Republican Skeksis in Florida proclaimed he was against gun control cuz JEEBUS.
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