Hey, y’all! Time for another shiny happy rainbow sparkle sunshine episode of The Hilarious Hick! Gross Scott Baio has done been accused of sexually assaulting a young actress from “Charles In Charge.” The greatest person to ever live – Miss Dolly Parton – won new Guinness World Records for “Most decades with a Top 20 hit on the US Hot Country Songs chart” and “Most hits on the US Hot Country Songs chart by a female artist.” A Hick is leaning toward agreeing with CNN’s Ashleigh Banfield in saying “sugar, it sounds like just a bad date” in regards to the accusation against Aziz Ansari. Trying not to gag, The Hick covers the poor woman who was Harvey Weinstein’s jizz cleaner. Former GOP chair Michael Steele told off evangelicals who decided to give Trump a “mulligan” for Stormy Daniels. And LOTS more, mothertruckers!